Thursday, April 29, 2010

Yikes and Yuck!


So today I don't have a fictitious story OR a poem. That is what the yikes is for. I thought it would be X that did me in. Trouble with Y is how the heck do you come up with a story that starts with a Y word? Okay I'm sure you could, but today I'm completely exhausted and practically falling asleep right now. Fortunately I DO have a little story about one of my sons.


First I want to start out by saying that my husband is a HUGE germaphobe. I mean he goes all out when people are sick in the house with disinfectant wipes and Lysol spray. He won't go near the sick person as long as they are sick. I'm not even close to exaggerating.

So Why, WHY in the name of Heaven would he choose to give our three-year-old a spoon and a jar of peanut butter and say "have at it"? Well, I know the answer and that is that our three-year-old does not eat anything. You think I'm kidding. There are about three things he eats. Yogurt, peanut butter sandwiches, and carrots. I'm exaggerating a little but only a little.

This morning my husband had one of those silly moments and let our son eat out of the jar of peanut butter. I was WAY too tired to argue, and at that point I was just fighting to stay awake.

Hubby left for work. I was just alternating between spacing out and trying to stay awake. I did notice that the baby was being awfully quiet. I knew he had to be into something. I looked around and low and behold there was little Noah sitting on the floor with the jar of peanut butter. He was happily sucking his fingers free of the massive globs of peanut butter he had reached in the jar for. It was everywhere! On his arms, legs, hands, and I hardly need add his face.

I grabbed the jar of peanut butter. My little guy sure knows how to protest too. So amid cries and endless thrashing I attempted to wipe the sticky mess off. I got most of it off, but I still need to give him a bath tonight. I figured he would get messier as the day progressed so I didn't need to waste water and soap so early.

The really sad thing is this is not the first time I have had to deal with this exact same situation. It was hilarious the first time, mildly amusing the second time, and completely unfunny this morning.

Tips to me from myself:

1. Watch the baby, stupid!

2. No more peanut butter out of the jar for Elijah, dummy!

3. Put the peanut butter away in the cabinet, silly!

4. Watch the baby, stupid!

*Takes a bow*


Nf1andprek-whisper said...

as long as baby is not allergic your good, dont' be mad at yourself it happens, YOUR post was so funny today, Yikes and YuCK very funny.
I like the germaphope part I am so NOT like that but many friends are. have a great weekend, and I am having a blogging challenge like Arlee in June if you are intersted... keep in touch.

arlee bird said...

Ah yes, I remember, one of the scariest things--kids that are being really quiet-- definitely mischief in tow.

That was a great post. Thought you couldn't think of anything? There you go!

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Anonymous said...


My colleagues think I'm insane laughing so hard at my computer ;)

I can just picture it...
It's like the day my 3 year old went all quiet and when I found her she was painted GREEN with fabric paint from head to toe... "But I wanted to be a green-one-eyed-monster mommy"...

Peggy said...

Very funny Marjorie!

Watery Tart said...

Well YOU might not be amused, but I certainly am... and I understand how peanut butter makes even the SHORTEST list of things someone would eat (it was on my own short list as a kid)

(sorry about that... oh, and... watch the baby)

Marjorie said...

@ Whisper- I need to remind myself especially when I'm tired. I'm not really mad at myself.

@ Lee- Well, this is the only story that fit. I guess it was good enough.

@ God's student- I'm glad you got a good laugh. :)

@ Mom- You would have been cracking up. I mean seriously cracking up especially the first time it happened.

@ Tami- The story is always amusing in hindsight, but it was just not funny at the time. I was so tired yesterday.

Yeah Elijah doesn't eat ANYTHING. It's very frustrating. Thanks for the reminder. Hahahahaha!

Kierah Jane Reilly said...

haha! this was great - it sounds like your son is getting all the food groups at least with yogurt, pb sandwiches and carrots. yeah, it's taken me a few years to get used to switching from the mindset of "if it's quiet, they're getting into trouble" to "if it's quiet, they're in their rooms reading"

aaahhh, the good old days!